Day by Day by Chris Muir



Monday, January 21, 2008

Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever

Kathy at Cake Eater Chronicles serves up one of those lists that make the rounds from time to time. This one is a sampling of memorable metaphors and analogies from high school essays. Here are several that made me simultaneously laugh and grimace:

  • The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
  • He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River.
  • From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
  • McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
  • Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

Kathy shares 25 of these gems over at her blog.

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